Saturday, December 31, 2005

100 Things I Didn't Know Last Year

The BBC 100 Things We Didn't Know Last Year is always a festive highlight, and this year I've learnt a fair few things myself

  1. Just like Birmingham, Dublin buses don't give you change
  2. Even ones favourite bands struggle to be constantly impressive live, Nick Cave for example, and others, such as Hayseed Dixie, should just be treated as the novelty they are. Motorhead however, will never disappoint, even if seen twice in one week.
  3. Just when I thought Gin couldn't get any better, I discover Gordon's Distillers Cut, which for some reason cannot be obtained in England. It's garnished with strawberries
  4. I learnt to make cocktails, White Russians being a favourite
  5. They don't like people with long hair working in four star hotels, and opinion shared in North Korea, who say long hair lowers intelligence.
  6. Jonathan Swift was a bit like the Irish George Orwell, and although best remember for Gullivers Travels, he also wrote a book suggesting that babies where eaten in order to relieve the effects of the potato famine. His epithet declares "Here he lies where furious indignation can no longer rend his heart".
  7. On the outskirts of Berlin you still come across wild deer
  8. Wild Deer are also found in Phoenix Park, which is very cold at 5 AM in November.
  9. Czech food uses a lot of garlic, and includes food so garlically it tastes more garlicy than raw garlic itself
  10. Lou Reed is a cock, I hope he gets hit by a train
  11. Dublin libraries may have free CD hire, but they don't have a great selection
  12. But an easier answer still is just downloading albums of bittorrent sites
  13. The word "Quiz" was invented in Dublin as part of a bet to introduce a word to the English language in 24 hours. Despite this, the pub quiz is a rarity in Dublin
  14. Lithuania has the worlds only statue of Frank Zappa, and additionally, a statue of a man who resembles Morrissey.
  15. Cruise liners don't like employing people with long hair
  16. The ukulele is cool, and so simple even I can play it
  17. Look for Fray Bentos Pies on eBay, you'll find nothing
  18. The infamous Canadian meal, Kraft Dinner comes in a box that says four portions, but most of those hockey hungry people eat the whole box themselves!
  19. O2 are scum, I really dislike them. The highstreet stores tell you one thing, on-line tell you another, O2 Ireland will have nothing to do with O2 UK, and when I need to find out my phones PLUP Code nobody knows what I'm talking about or can help. Still, in the UK they give you a lot of free mins..
  20. When you tell peolpe you see a wild seal, they tend not to believe you. But I saw one! In Howth harbour!
  21. Japan doesn't like English teachers to have long hair
  22. The 11 O'Clock drinking hours where introduced by the English during WW1 in order to make sure workes where in a fit state for working the next day
  23. Vanilla milk is brilliant
  24. Ireland aren't very big up on postcodes
  25. Sweedish soup is very sweet as opposed to savoury, Blabars Soppa is my favourite
  26. In Iceland, they don't have surnames
  27. When in the Berlin Museum of Medical History, sometimes it's best not being able to translate the signs
  28. The Reichstag and the statue of O'Connell in Dublin still have bullet marks
  29. Avoid the City Manor hostel in Dublin like asbestos in your milk
  30. If you like a nice pint of bitter, it might be best to avoid Ireland, they don't have any. They don't have real ale either. I found this lack of proper drink confussing seeing that they're a nation of alcoholics.
  31. Irish gypsies never use guns, Snatch was a load of bollocks
  32. If anyone ever tells you to go see The Devils Rejects, what they really mean to say is that they hate you and want you to suffer
  33. If anybody tells you to go and see Oldboy, they're just trying to traumatize you
  34. Scouce people are the best drink tippers in the world
  35. Gwar employ the use of fake blood in thier live shows, and it not only stains your cloths and skin, it'll turn your contact lenses pink. You end up looking so bad shops on the curry mile don't even try to intice you in.
  36. If seeking Mexican food in Dublin, go to Burritos 'N' Blues
  37. The Irish don't half go on about U2, despite the obvious detail of them being shit and all the guitar work sounding hte same. Thin Lizzy recieve very little attention
  38. The Dublin Rock 'N' Stroll tour is no stroll at all. In fact, by the time it's finished, it's likly half you group will have died
  39. Now you can sign-on over the phone!
  40. Liverpool has no jobs at all, if you are here, leave, go somewhere with not jsut better opeprtunity, but any opeprtunity.
  41. I really can't inhale to save my life
  42. Magic Mushrooms are no threat to society, they really shouldn't be a Class A product
  43. Berlin has a great kebab culture, and you can get feta cheese on them!
  44. When reading Will Self, just buy the short stories, it's all so hit and miss I'd rather have a book of short stories I like half of than a full book I can't bring myself to read. Doesn't he look like John Cale...
  45. The Simpsons is much deeper than I ever assumed and has a great message of Bart as a Punk Rock icon. Read Planet Simpson.
  46. My accent has no home, and now people think I'm Irish, which makes me sad
  47. I did my first grave homage this year, to see Phil Lynott. I listened to Cowboy song, and I plan to find Benny Hill next.
  48. Pork Scratchings are very rare outside England, and the same applies for crumpets
  49. Bunratty Mead is lovely, but impossible to find in the UK. It makes a nice hot toddy
  50. I saw End of the Century three times at the cinema, the first time almost had me in tears. It is without doubt the best rockumentry ever made.
  51. In Ireland high street health food superstars Holland & Barratt are called Natures Way
  52. Northern Ireland is messed up. Besides the political tension, they have four different forms of each bank note, one for each of the main banks who produce thier own money. They also use English money.
  53. Never bother with Smirnoff vodka, it's shite. Much nicer alternitives include Absolut Vodka, which after the fore menioned soup is the best thing to ever come out of Sweeden. Better still is the Finnish Vodka, Finlandia, who sponsor schools in some countries. But the best of all is a long vodka, which takes just a drop of angostura for the magic to happen.
  54. No visit to Dublin is complete without seeing the Temple Bar Farmers Market, they make a nice Millionare Square (And there are lots of free samples).
  55. Ireland also lacks dry cider, it's Bulmers all the way, and it's sweet.
  56. "Ahoyhoy!" was the telephone greeting suggested by its invention, Mr. Alexander Graham Bell.
  57. I've averaged a post on this Blog once every 3.78 days
  58. Everyone, everywhere knows who Benny Hill was
  59. Very few children in Tallaght still own horses, despitet he famous series of photos in the 80's
  60. Beans take longer to microwave than I thought
  61. WD40 dissolves cocaine
  62. Authentic schezwan spice may well burn a third eye into your forehead.
  63. You know those things for frothing up fancy coffes? If you use them to play a bass, you'll break the strings
  64. Pernod is green, but when you add ice, it turns yellow
  65. It's advisable to always keep a copy of your phone numbers somewhere
  66. A good cure for a cold or sore throat is hot milk with honey, butter and garlic in. A dash of gin would make it nicer to
  67. Irish bank accounts charge you for every deposit and withdrawal
  68. I may be the only person who genuinly likes Futurama season 4
  69. Web sites in The Cook Islands end in .co.ck
  70. The Critic was brilliant, I have no understand why everyone hated it
  71. I'm getting balder
  72. I learnt to play with a draddle
  73. Don't try to ride the trains in Berlin without a ticket, they're helluva strickt and have under cover ticket inspects
  74. Ireland has three patron Saints, Patrick, Bridget, and another one...
  75. St. Brigit was from Kildare, the Irish Museum has a shrine for one of her shoes, and she is also a Pagan Godess.
  76. Records sound better than any other record format
  77. In Berlin, you can live of beer and kebabs and feel healthier than living in England
  78. The English don't like the Scouce, the Irish love the Scouce, and the Irish still have hard feelings against the English.
  79. Sometimes life has such terrible twists you have to laugh and commend the forces that be for thier ingiuity, such as when I lost my camera stealing pete
  80. Pete doesn't burn that well
  81. Sea water is very good for feet
  82. Learning how to say cheers in a forigen language is a good way to break down the language barrier
  83. The last words in Gone With The Wind are "After all, tomorrow is another day"
  84. Jon would sleep with Morgan Freeman is he has been hypnotized so that everybody looked like Morgan Freeman

I guess that's all I learnt this year, apart from a bit of Japaneese and some curry making tips, but that isn't very interesting.

# posted by Dean Ellison : 4:53 pm
Comments:
Fun Blog! Hope you don't mind me leaving a comment or two.
6: In Swift's defence the babies thing was satire.
17: Try again you might be pleasantly surprised!
37 & 47: I eschewed the temptation to support U2 when I was a 1970's teenager in favour of a rival Dublin band called the Lookalikes - I've always known how to pick a winner! I was so besotted by Phil Lynott when I was a teenager that I pretended for years that I had met him when in fact it was my friend who had.(By sad coincidence she had a conversation with him almost exactly where the memorial statue is erected)
44: Although I'm not besotted by him I do quite like Will Self and did find myself drinking whiskey with him in Cambridge one cold winter evening.
46: I'm Irish but people continually think I'm Canadian, or South African or New Zelandish - they can't quite decide.
49: When I was a child I went to Bunratty Castle with my parents for a Medieval banquet - I didn't like the mead - but I was only 10.
54: Temple Bar was a bit of a shithole when I lived in Ireland.

Re 10 Dec post, there is somewhere in the world a movie of the Leonard Cohen book "The favourite game". It was made in 2003 probably in Canada, I think it's French language and I can't find a region 2 DVD anywhere and that's making me a bit cross - but it has prompted me to re-read the book so something good has come out of me finding out that tantalising bit of information.

82: Slainte!
x Angela
# posted by Blogger Angela : 11:21 pm
 
Post a Comment

<< Home

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?


FREE Hit Counters!