Things To Do In England When You're Dead

I don't know when or why, but famed Newcastle-under-Lyme rock pub, The Rigger, has closed it's doors. Sources visiting from the good land of Stoke broke the news to me this weekend of a pint of black and tan, and altough it is not known for certain why the place left so suddenly, all theories put forward so far implicate Buff. Stories range from him lifting from the till (Which I doubt) and him going mad, presumably the fame from appearing on The Weakest Link being too much for him.

While many will remember The Rigger for it's incredibly expensive drinks (Lowenbaru £2.70?!) I remember it as my choice venue druing the first year of Uni, a Jimi Hendrix tribute band who looked like Thin Lizzy (The technicaly proficent Are You Experinced?), the Monday student nights and the also defunct Millenniumm Kebab across the road. Many a good nights had, and will be sadly missed.

My persuit for employment took me to unexplored terroitory this week, Ilkley, about 30mins outside of Leeds, near Howrth. In another classic example of a sense of humour in the forces that be I saved £20 by getting the Job Centre to pay for my rain ticket, then lost £10 at the bus stop.

Ilkley, it must be said, is in the middle of nowhere and would be a vast departure from Dublin. However, it does have a fantastic Northern feel, it's not far from Leeds (Which seems to have a lot going for it), and it's accomodation included.

Interview went well, turned up late and asked for the wrong name due to incorect information from the agency, and then learnt the guy dealing with me had been fired for general inneptness. I would be entrusted with my own bar, to do with as I see fit, but the whole thing had a sense of "proper job" and I think that might compromise my freedom a bit too much. However, I think they want me to come up again some time for a trial, which would be fun.

I did make a wonderful discovery in Ilkley, that it stocks Gordons Distillers Cut Gin (Quadrulpe distiller, hint of lemongrass and ginger...) in abundence, and this is typical seeing that earlier in the week I'd had to arrange someone to bring me some from from Dublin. This brings the count of sightings of this magnificent gin to three and the second place I've found it for sale (At a bargin prince opf £14.99).

I imagine a venture to Ilkley by train again some time in the future, reguardless of job trial.

After seeing Lou Reed with disastrous results last year, the pressure was on one John Cale to show that ex-members of The Velvet underground still have what it takes to do a good show? Not that I was expecting him to live in his former bands shadow, witch such an impressive collection of solo albums under his belt it would be hard for him to unimpress (But then, that's what I thought about Lou Reed (The cock)).

Missed the support act (In fact, not sure if there even was one (Just like Lou Reed...) but got a good view in the suprisingly empty venue (A small venue to begin with) and things took of to a good start, with a heavy focus on newer material from Hobospaiens and Black Acetate. The first classic we got was Femme Fatal, s nice surprise, and played much in a much reworked styling. Nice. Things where looking good, on album opener "Outta The Bag" he failed to even try the high notes, but things like this are quickly forgotten when he launches into "Guts" (In B flat). Other notable moments include "Things" and before we knew it he played new single "perfect" and then left the stage. It had been good, and I was ready for him to come on for the second part of the show and treat us to the classics. The band return, "Buffalo Ballet", in the Rock 'N' Roll fashion John Cale says his shows have, spirits run high, everyone is getting into the show now that the pace is finally picking up.. Then it ends.

I must confess some disappointment with the evening, and it would be easy to dismiss, but despite everything the whole event was saved just by the fact we where watching John Cale. I mean, the mans credits are amazing, a truly gifted musician, producer for Patti Smith and the Stooges, worked with local legend's The Happy Mondays, a real good sound set up and high quality band.. But still, we didn't even get to see him play the vialo for which he is so well known.

It I also slightly unfair to make constant comparisons to Lou Reed, a shadow I'm sure the man himself has heard all too much of. But when you're part of a legacy there is always the expectation to be given a glimpse of it in order to let people hear music they where born 20 years too late for (His version of "Hallelujah" would have been nice to).

All in all the gig reads like a school report card, terms like "Not bad, must try harder" and "Excels when he applies himself" coming to mind.

it seems when he played the venue in 2003 he performed a much more satisfactory set

For some time I have had an unhealthy obsession with confession site Group Hug. But now, when ever the night is just too late, or writing a CV too boring, I turn my attention to Find A Death.

Group Hug has become a bit boring recently, now I can turn my attention to find out how and where celebrities died, see photos of their mailboxes (Some obsession of the web master) and discover just how free information is on the Internet by read celebrity death certificates. Some may find that creepy but I'd disagree, its informative, how else are people suppose to find out Buddy Holly's scrotum was chopped in half in the plane crash that also killed him and removed half of his head? Besides, it's only the photos of dead chlocelebrities, like Sam Cooke, Kurt Cobain and Lenny Bruce which are the really creepy.

I'm not sure just how the guy gets all the info, but someone somewhere is abusing their powers of working in a funeral home. What I like most about the site is just how distasteful it can be, and downright creepy. Getting locks of hair from Kurt Cobain while he was laid out? Getting photos of Paula Yates' purse collection? Where should it end?

However, when it comes down to it, I need something to entertain me on sleepless nights, and black humor really is my cup of Tea, and the site is just so informative! Long live Find A Death!

John Cales new video is on his website, it's for Perfect, the song which was clearly going to be the ssingle from his last, hip-hop production values inspired albu, BlackAcetate.

For some reason it seems to suggest that his music makes things wither and die while he himself slowy starts to decay. A tad self-critical I think.

Perfect (Windows Media Player)

Perfect (Real Player)

And in keeping with the ethos and content of this site, they're both links to the high quality versions.

Isn't the album cover reminiscent of Leonard Cohens Various Positions?

I think I may have sold out slightly. After turning down jobs at Four Season, cruise liines and teaching English in Japan I went and got a hair cut today before a job interview, and I even took out my piercings and removed the Neubauten and Maple leaf badges from my lappel.

It's nothing drastic, just a neaten up to help with the slim chance of getting a supervisor post at Holiday Inn (And it'd be worth it, I'd get to make a cocktail menu). It was also killing two birds with one stone, as I have another interview tomorrow at the Hope Street Hotel.

The whole interview experince was rewarding however, when bringing up the issue of long hair they said they'd be willing to make a compromise, something so reasonable I even agreed I could cut it shorter (Still long enough to be tied back and maintain a rock credibility however). But I doubt I'd ever get the post in a million years.

The employment machine continues to roll on in Leeds to, live in supervisor position at The Farsyde Restaurant, thanks to the good people at Bearkly Scott Group. The guy kept saying it was Farsyde with a y, all i could think of was Pharcyde with a hip-hop feel, or maybe the popular Gary Larson comic strip.

Another year, another thrilling Darts final, another early exit for fan favourite, Andy "The Viking" Fordham. Raymond van "Barney" Barneveld eventually lost to new-comer Jelle Klaasen, a close final, five sets to seven, but Barney cleary wasn't keeping his cool or playing his best.

I did think during the tournemnt they where spending more and more time watching the darts players wives, perhaps them being the glamerous part of the sport, or maybe it's so the player can show of teh benifits of being a darts superstar.

Rich Hall is one of the few American comedians to infiltrate the UK and make a good job of it, absorbing the comedy atmosphere and doing his own thing rather than trying to emulate the American perception of "British Humor" like so many others. He seems a regular over here now, appearing on shows such as Never Mind The Buzzcocks, QI, and I think he may have been on Have I Got News For You (Classics, one and all, apart from QI).

To my knowledge his first big thing over here was The Rich Hall Fishing Show, I never caught it all as I was living out the country, but I liked what I caught and the ending to the series was more memorable than the last episode of Nathan Barley. Now I have a chance to keep more up to date as his new show, Rich Halls Cattle Driver, where he and a fellow American friend Mike Wilmot have decided to steal police horses, become cow boys and driver some cattle to Wales using a well referenced motorway.

The first episode was promising, hard to believe a foreigner could make accurate observations on English life, I forget what they where exactly, I was up past my prime last night dealing with the standard not sleeping problems. I'll be sure to catch a repeat then make this seem like a piece of writing that actually amounts to making some sort of point.

Want to see what Tom Waits album you are?

My answer:

"You are Frank's Wild Years. Since you are the music
from Tom Waits's stage play of the same name,
you have quite a bit of thematic coherence.
That was supposed to be a compliment"



On Quizilla you can learn almost anything you want to know. What kind of wings you would have? What memeber of My Chemical Romance are you? There is even one aboue wether you prefare Green Day or My Chemical Romance, and while I haven't tried the quiz, I'm sure you if you opted for answers leading towards brain abnormailities, head wounds, drinking turps and being a gullible little shit Green Day will come out as your favourite.

I also found out what kind of dancer I am:




That's right, I'm a dancer who has fallen over, such is my grace, rhythm and connection with the music...

It's sad that Charles Kennedy has finally been ousted, after making the Liberal Democrats thier strongesyt in 86 years, just because he's a recovering alcoholic, just because his cabinte doesn't have confidence in him, just because he missed almost every major vote in the last five years...

But the man had such charm, he came across as an honest man with clear limitations and fighting for a third party that most people concider a joke, and he made choices that made the party come across as The Real Alternitive, opposing War in iraq and Top-Up Fees, and how could people not want to support the party when claiming the only tax raise they would intoduce would be for those earning over 100k?

But people just aren't taking to the party, so we can only hope the next leader has as much charms as his predecessor but with perhaps a little less love of the bottle...

I've been writting the Blog over a year now, maybe not as regular now, and I'd be the first to admit a decline in quality, maybe lack of enthusasim, but I've not had so much to say to be honest. Still, I think it was worth the minimal effort and will serve my enjoyment if nobody elses.

It was a good year 2005, one I will defintly look bck on as I lay upon my death bed and remember fondly, Ireland, Berlin, more time in Leeds, the like...

Shame I'm now back living in Liverpool, just been re-employed in the same job I was in last year, in fact, seem to be in almost the exact same position as last year (Plus memories and experince).

Have some job opeprtunities ahead in Leeds, as a supervisor none the less, and even the chance to move to a private island in the Isle of Scilly, which is miles, but I do get to go there by helicopter.

So, I guess in '06 I need to make some longer lasting changes, I aim to get a cocktail liscence, driving liscence, and take a tour of Europe with some amigos, although it does seemed doomed to be a tragedy, an unmitigated tragedy...

I'll review in one years times jsut how many of these targets are reached...